(Read the rest of the cartoon here.)
There have been several funny events this week, and I suppose I should get them posted before April First, since they're all true.
First is Doc Thompson, guest hosting The Glenn Beck Program, claiming that the new tax on tanning beds is racist because dark-skinned people don't visit tanning salons! Yeah, we white people suffer so much discrimination, don't we? And in this case, apparently none of us more than John Boehner, House Minority Leader.
And where was Glenn Beck? Well, giving a talk at the University of Central Florida, where 53 cars were towed away after his fans parked in a fraternity parking lot. Apparently, pranksters put up signs indicating the private lot was "Event Parking."
OK, that's kind of a dirty trick, wasn't it? Then again, they were fans of Glenn Beck, so it's hard to feel too sympathetic. And maybe this will teach them not to be so gullible (not about falling for fake parking signs, but falling for complete lunatics like Beck).
Meanwhile, Fox News proudly ran a story the liberal media missed, the ironic death of a global warming activist who froze to death at the South Pole. Only maybe they should have checked the facts with Snopes.com first. As Snopes says, the source for this parody was a satirical website, the ecoEnquirer. Nice fact-checking, Fox! Next time, stick to reliable sources like The Onion.
And here's J. D. Shapiro, apologizing for writing the worst movie ever. Admittedly, he's got a good excuse, because he was trying to meet girls. And his apology is pretty funny, too:
Now, looking back at the movie with fresh eyes, I can't help but be strangely proud of it. Because out of all the sucky movies, mine is the suckiest.
In the end, did Scientology get me laid? What do you think? No way do you get any action by boldly going up to a woman and proclaiming, "I wrote Battlefield Earth!" If anything, I'm trying to figure out a way to bottle it and use it as birth control. I'll make a mint!