Monday, June 24, 2013


I'm starting a new Internet business called KickBeginner, and I hope you'll help me get the word out.

You might have heard of the controversy at Kickstarter, where a sexual assault manual was recently funded. (Indeed, it was over-subscribed, which might tell you something about our society.)

Now, Kickstarter has apologized, with a flat-out "We were wrong" and a $25,000 donation to an anti-sexual violence organization, and they vowed this wouldn't happen again.
Third, we are prohibiting “seduction guides,” or anything similar, effective immediately. This material encourages misogynistic behavior and is inconsistent with our mission of funding creative works. These things do not belong on Kickstarter.

Suddenly, I see a business opportunity. :)  What are those people to do, now that they can't get funded on Kickstarter? Well, why not come to KickBeginner, instead?

We're not just for misogynists, either. If you can't get your racist, sexist, homophobic, or religiously bigoted project approved on Kickstarter, you're welcome here. We'll set you up with your own page on KickBeginner, where you can describe your plans in nauseating detail.

Then, people worldwide can come here and kick you in the butt. With luck, all those kicks will succeed in dislodging your head from your ass, and you can discover a new beginning - 'KickBeginner,' right? - free from all that idiocy.

Of course, there will be a small charge - I have to eat (and I have expensive tastes) - but I see this as a community service, if you'll excuse the expression. (I know that many of you are lunatics when it comes to that sort of thing, too.)

I expect this to be a benefit to you, to get kicked in the ass, a benefit to the people doing the kicking (it's cathartic, it really is), and a benefit to society in general. After all, the more people who get their head kicked out of their ass, the better we'll all be.

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